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Thread: Restraining Order Help.

  1. #1

    Default Restraining Order Help.

    Alright, so I know that no one here is a lawyer, but I need some advice from anyone who might have any experience with them.

    So as most of you know about 5 months ago I had one of my best friends tell me that I should just end my life because there was no end to my depression. I had a suicide attempt shortly after and have been better ever since.

    This girl is continuing to try and make my life hell, even though I am better. She is now spreading the rumor that I threatened to shoot her boyfriend, I have already gone to the police, but there is nothing they can do since I can only name the one rumor, even though I am being approached by her friends questioning me. I am fearful for my safety due to the false accusations she is making about me.

    I have screen shots of her admitting that she told me to kill myself and that she "had the right to say it." I have screen shots of her denying that she is spreading the rumor and screen shots of a text from her best friend telling me otherwise.

    She is being careful about not contacting me directly, everything she has done is indirect to cause as many problems for me as possible.

    My question here is do you think I have enough to get a civil restraining order on her? and will it stop her from the indirect contact aka sending her friends after me?

  2. #2

    Default

    This is where you need to contact a real lawyer or perhaps an assistant district attorney. Whatever she's doing doesn't sound legal to me, but the burden of proof would be on you. Collect as much evidence as you can and they take it to a lawyer.

    I'm guessing you must be on some other social media to be getting all this poison? This is why I don't participate in those sorts of things, but then I don't have friends or even acquaintances like her in my life. I would delete that account not have anything to do with any of those people. It's your final revenge.

  3. #3

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by dogboy View Post
    This is where you need to contact a real lawyer or perhaps an assistant district attorney. Whatever she's doing doesn't sound legal to me, but the burden of proof would be on you. Collect as much evidence as you can and they take it to a lawyer.

    I'm guessing you must be on some other social media to be getting all this poison? This is why I don't participate in those sorts of things, but then I don't have friends or even acquaintances like her in my life. I would delete that account not have anything to do with any of those people. It's your final revenge.
    I wish I could pin point who is feeding her information, sadly I have way to many friends to delete and start over. Facebook is literally my only contact with the furry community. Right now I am working on getting a lawyer, but I was hoping to get any advice from anyone who may have had to deal with kind of thing before that could tell me what I am getting into before I get the lawyer.

  4. #4

    Default

    So, I am a lawyer, but the mark of any good lawyer talking to you on the Internet and being ethical about it is that they can't actually answer your question. Sorry about that, like doctors, it's one of those professions where someone can only really answer it after they've seen you in person and gone over all the evidence.

    What I can say is that, in general, most judges require three solid separate pieces of evidence to justify a restraining order (because honestly, restraining orders are a pain in the neck to enforce, so they really don't want to give them out unless you can show some kind of pattern). What is often done is to collect evidence and to call the police if one's safety feels threatened, keeping records of everything that happened. Then, if the problem doesn't go away, people often point to the repeated police calls and difficulty dealing with the problem as their evidence to get a restraining order. I can't say for sure if that applies to your situation though, whether it makes sense to call the police here or not, or if that's even what you need. The only way you can figure that out is to talk to a lawyer where you are and have them look into the question.

  5. #5

    Default

    Would a restraining order even work in this situation? If she is not actually approaching or directly contacting you, there is nothing to restrain except her rumour-mongering, which is a) difficult (though not impossible) to prove, and b) difficult to enforce a prohibition on. While restraining orders can be used in a situation like this, they're not really designed for it, since you aren't at direct risk of physical or emotional harm from her.

    There's always the option of persuing a civil case for slander, but that may be expensive, and again, there's no guarantee of success.

    Regardless, you need to set all the details of the problem before a legal professional in person. Just be sure to document everything first. Write everything out to get it clear in your own head before you attempt to explain it to someone else.

  6. #6

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by Akastus View Post
    Would a restraining order even work in this situation? If she is not actually approaching or directly contacting you, there is nothing to restrain except her rumour-mongering, which is a) difficult (though not impossible) to prove, and b) difficult to enforce a prohibition on. While restraining orders can be used in a situation like this, they're not really designed for it, since you aren't at direct risk of physical or emotional harm from her.

    There's always the option of persuing a civil case for slander, but that may be expensive, and again, there's no guarantee of success.

    Regardless, you need to set all the details of the problem before a legal professional in person. Just be sure to document everything first. Write everything out to get it clear in your own head before you attempt to explain it to someone else.
    Also a good question. There have, at times, been orders simply prohibiting people from going on certain websites, or even in some cases from using the Internet at all (yes, really), but that's rather extreme and very difficult to enforce.

  7. #7

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by ArchieRoni View Post
    Also a good question. There have, at times, been orders simply prohibiting people from going on certain websites, or even in some cases from using the Internet at all (yes, really), but that's rather extreme and very difficult to enforce.
    Which cases would those be, out of interest? The surveillance and monitoring costs for that would be pretty high. I don't think I've ever heard of steps like that outside of terrorism-related matters.

  8. #8

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by Akastus View Post
    Which cases would those be, out of interest? The surveillance and monitoring costs for that would be pretty high. I don't think I've ever heard of steps like that outside of terrorism-related matters.
    I'm not at liberty to divulge names of cases that I've been involved in and don't know specific names of ones I haven't been, though I know some fact patterns. The ones I know about are generally people who were under some kind of monitoring anyway though. Things like people who were on probation and therefore had a probation officer checking in on them, and the idea was their computer could be confiscated if it was found that they'd posted on certain websites. Or people who were in the hospital and had certain privilege suspended while they were there because they were abusing them.

  9. #9
    MarchinBunny

    Default

    I once had a run in with someone who was consistently depressed about everything and I can tell you this, it was one of the most irritating things I have ever had to experience in my life. You get to a point where you may actually feel like telling that person to go kill themselves since they talk about it so much. Now, obviously I have never done that, but I can sort of understand why it could happen. People generally don't like being around others who just constantly are downers about everything. Since you called her your best friends I assume at least at one point, you two where really good friends but that depression of yours drove her over the edge. I could be wrong. Either way, what she is doing is wrong no doubt.

    Personally speaking, I wouldn't call her a best friend anymore. I also don't think you could get a restraining order. However, you probably could talk to a lawyer if you feel it's worth doing so.

  10. #10

    Default

    Restraining order or pressing charges is the way to go. Since it has caused some psychological issues, depression, and there was the attempt, she would more than just be in trouble with the law.

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