Im so confused and hurt
by, 25-Sep-2014 at 12:25 (1151 Views)
My wife told me that she wants nothing to do with my little side or wants to be exposed to any part of it from now on. We have been together for over 3 years and any time she has told me this in the past she has told me later that she didn't mean it and she loves that part of me, well last night I found out its all been a lie and she hates it. The reason she hates it is because it reminds her of what she can't have, she wants a child before she's 25 she's about to turn 23 I told her I may never be ready to have a child because I'm not mentally stable yet with everything I've been going thru with depression and possible PTSD I'm seeing my therapist every week trying to get help, were also not financially stable enough and our house is not very nice it has a lot of problems that need to be fixed before I bring a child into it.
Her response is that we will never be truly ready and I understand that but she says she wants a "husband" not someone who wants to sleep in a daiper,pajamas with a pacifier ( I rarely ever sleep with anything other then my small stuffed giraffe and sometimes a pacifier).
I'm so confused about all this I've taken all my stuff
And put it in our spare room so she wouldn't be around at all the time but that's still not good enough.
How am I supposed to just stop something that I've done since I was little it helps me forget the hurtful stuff thats happned to me and i can feel like im loved for once. I have no love for myself its been years since i really truely loved myself and for some reason when im little all the hurtful stuff goes away and i love myself for once. I've told her all this before but she still doesn't care.
She told me the reason she had a panic attack last time we were buying some of my stuff was because
it reminded her that she may never have a child, I'm in no way trying to replace her having a child I just don't know when or if I will be able to handle the added stress of raising a child.