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Jamieboy

Diapers and marriage

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I've tried searching for the right forum to connect with other married diaper lovers, but I haven't managed to find the correct spot, so I figured I would start a blog entry. I'm not big on blogs, but where else.

Me, I'm married, 25+ years, to a wonderful lady, who knew of my diaper desires just as soon as it became obvious to me that she was "the one". It wasn't easy to broach the subject, since everything had been going pretty good for us both, in our newfound friendship. My diaper collection, at that point, amounted to a few pairs of my favorite plastic pants, the occasional kid diaper purchases I'd made over the years, and a collection of over two hundred Forum Magazines, many with diaper content being hidden in the overall collection.

I'd had many unfulfilling relationships in the years prior, but we were both adults now, and this was adult love, no doubt about it. Before long, the proposal was made, and our life together started. In the early days, diapers definitely played a back seat to all of our other activities, but one thing that was different was that instead of using plastic panties for my sexual releases, I was now making love like man & woman typically do. It was great. It was adult. It was new and awesome. Not to be forgotten, there was diaper play. At that point, it tended more towards diaper wearing, with the difference being that adult diapers were now a part of my "collection". I wasn't having orgasms in diapers, per se, but I was getting to experiment with things a bit, with my wife trying to wind her way through my fetish, and still feel wanted & desired. We got pregnant not too far down the road and had a son, adding a boy to her two girls, from a previous marriage. Life was good. We were busy. I was a business owner, so there was always something needing to be done.

The years began to stack up on us, with many memorable diaper episodes, and some not too memorable. We worked nearly constantly on righting the ship, but powerful forces kept us off kilter. At about this same time, I began to connect with DPF, when it was Diaper Pail Fraternity. I bought stuff from them, wrote a story they published, and just basically looked forward to that monthly/sporadic newsletter. At the same time BBS's were starting to spring up around the country, and if you searched hard enough, you could actually find ones related to diapers. My local BBS was Bytemine, a well rounded bulletin board with plenty to do, including downloading those first ever pics & stories of actual human adults wearing & enjoying diapers! I'm figuring this was in the late 1980's, and very early 1990's.

There were also the newsgroups, Alt.Sex.Fetish.Diapers, Alt.Binaries,Pictures.Erotica.Fetish.Diapers, Alt.Fan.Dean-Stark, and a couple more. IRC was also becoming more widely known, so if you found a IRC client, and a server with diaper rooms, you could actually connect in real time and have a diaper related chat with someone from around the planet. Life was full of new stuff, and the only thing was, it took a lot of time to be with it all, and it took a fair amount of computer & modem knowledge to access this stuff. Of course, this was all being done in the name of (diaper & computer) knowledge, so carry on, young soldier!

Anyway, during this same time, many efforts were made to include diapers in the marriage and lovemaking process, sometimes successfully, and sometimes not. Still, it was all brand new, and a person needed to figure their passage through the networks, the family issues, the job issues, and just life, in general. Our first major marriage disagreements began to surface, mostly about money & business related matters, but diapers were never very far from the core of the disenchantment, from the marital perspective.

More to come.

Comments

  1. Jamieboy's Avatar
    That was one of the things that used to bother me... The wife and I had plenty to disagree about in life, and with the kids, etc., but, almost invariably, whenever there was an argument, diapers crept into the discussion, which then went off into a very different direction. It was like they were the lightning rod in our marriage, always attracting the wrong kind of attention. We struggled to keep balance...

    Flash forward a couple of decades, and we're still here, but, in some ways, we're still at it. The past few years have been one of those "you do it your way, I'll do it mine" periods, where we were both just supposed to take care of ourselves and our "needs". By this time, I had been all over WetSet, ABKingdom, ILuvDiapers, BBIF, and other places. My nicks were fairly recognizable by most of the players there, but each and every place you'd go seemed to develop a life of its' own, sometimes good, sometimes bad. WetSet had lots of content initially, but then it always had some of "those people" that couldn't control themselves, making it less and less of a place to find yourself. Their format changed a bit, too, and I just wandered off. ABK was always great for pics. Never could read much of the site, unless using a translator, which got to be a bit much. About that same time, many of our diaper discussions and disagreements dealt with the volume and the need to collect photos. ILuvDiapers was an extension of Bytemine, so I was always happy to land there. They had great photosets, done by models, mostly, but there was content and discussion. Trouble is, there were a few Sad Sack's there (FB, you know who your are), too, ruining it for most of us. (There always has to be one, doesn't there.) Changes in format also made it a bit harder to do the free version, a bit like WetSet had changed things up. More and more, I found myself drifting off. BBIF, the smaller, and more compact email forum became the one single place I stayed, and even the wife picked up there, and had some discussions about diaper couples, etc. Boogles & Gary have done a fantastic job of just keeping it alive, when so many others have just given up. Still, even BBIF wasn't enough to satisfy this insatiable need to learn more about what it is that makes diaper wearers tick. It was a constant, but I needed more...

    On the photos....
    I had lots. I'd say tens of thousands, but probably more like a few hundred thousand. Diaper pics one and all, but some of them were upsetting to the wife. I was sort of like a diaperpic hoarder, and, of course, many of you know that feeling, as if you need to possess those photos to belong, or to know about diaper life. I really didn't need all that I had, and since I don't do poo, I certainly didn't need any of those. We discussed it over and over, and finally, after I had pared the whole collection down a fair amount, the desire to collect pics shifted. I no longer had to "own" a copy of everything. She had such an issue with it all, it kind of took the wind out of the sails, so to speak. Amazingly, I stopped. Not sure how long ago that was, but it's been quite a few years now, maybe a decade. It's like the photos no longer represented anything to me that I hadn't already seen or done. And, since they were giving my wife such consternation, it just seemed easier to stop the process. As she put it, "they'll always be out there, and you can just go look, but why do you have to collect them all???" In effect, she was right. The pics don't go away, and you can always find more.

    Since some sites were just getting harder and harder to navigate, I tried new things and went new places, and eventually found both Fetlife and Experience Project. I have to say, EP was like a breath of fresh air. You created a profile, chose groups that you identified with, starting with the "I ...", as in "I Love Diapers", or "I Drink Scotch", or whatever. What made this site different was that you identify what groups you belonged to, and felt a kinship with, and then compare your profiles with others, to see where your likes meshed, or didn't. The biggest part of the site is "The Experience", so you could post your own Experience, and other like minded (or not) people could/would come along and comment on your experience. The difference between this site and WetSet and ILuvDiapers, and even BBIF was that your experience stayed online, (so far) forever, with the ability for people to find it, and comment on it years after you posted your experience. That was definitely different! It wasn't like other sites which tended to be harder to navigate, either. It was fairly easy to keep up with your own profile, or wander to your friends profiles to see their latest postings. I liked it, and I still do. Sure, it's not perfect, and many of my postings there will probably not get read by too many people, but they're there, even if I die, they'll remain, providing whatever snippet of information I offered, and any of the comments others posted in response. It seemed more alive than previous places I'd been part of, but even EP wasn't satisfied with their format, and changes were made that sometimes make it more difficult to navigate than it once was. Still, I like EP, and check in there often.

    FET was another relatively new site, mostly geared toward the BDSM crowd, but now forever populated by diaper wearers, in all of their incarnations. One thing I noticed on FET right away was that being a "Friend" to other people took a lot more effort. You'd read in people's profiles DO NOT FRIEND ME unless you message me, AND I accept you, blah, blah, blah.... Much different than EP, where friendship is a choice you make after someone contacts you requesting to be in your circle. If you look through their profile, and don't see a connection, you just don't include them in your circle, if you don't want. On FET, it's more like there's a closed door, with a "no trespassing - violators may be shot" sign. Maybe it's a response to all the other Social Media (FB, Tumblr, etc), and how the ingrates have muddied things up, but it's sad to see how few connections you actually get on FET, compared to EP. It also makes it harder, but not impossible, to find like minded people, but there's a HUGE disconnect there, with respect to age, and there's a sort of group mentality that infects some of the groups, clubbing to death anyone that dares enter with an opposing thought. Sort of like "Club Police"... Yes, you can call them moderators, but they act a lot more like club police, just deciding that your posting doesn't meet their standards, or that "someone" in the club might not like what you've said, so they remove it, as opposed to commenting on it. Not a very friendly place, in many respects, but still, a place you have to be, if you want to learn more about what makes us all tick in 2014.

    Gonna leave it there for now... Still wondering if there's a place here where couples interact with advice, etc. regarding one, or both, spouses being in diapers???
    Updated 03-Sep-2014 at 16:24 by Jamieboy (Spelling correction)
  2. Beloney's Avatar
    Wow..... This hits close to home for me. Similarities.
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