I Jumped Into My Little Side Completely
by, 26-Aug-2014 at 06:25 (582 Views)
My little has been nagging at me recently. Let me explain: Since accepting my little as a part of my life, it has simply grown more into my mentality. I never expected it, but my little has become a greater and greater part of my personality, which leads to more indulgence (see my previous blog post).
I finally realized that many of my problems such as, getting schoolwork done and taking care of my life, stem from not only my disabilities, but also from the stress of concealing and suppressing my AB/DL/little side. In the past I had to dedicate time to one side or the other of my personality because they didn't mix. When I was or had to be in adult mode, my little side had to be suppressed, and when I was in little mode, it was difficult to do adult things. When the times didn't work out right, a responsibility would be neglected.
Recently, I bought a cars, truck, and planes bedding set and plastic sheets to complement my little personality.
For about a week, I kept my old blanket over it when someone else potentially might see it, but my roommate and his girlfriend saw it when I was initially putting it on. Just last night, I gave up trying to conceal my kiddish bedding because I feel happy and comfortable seeing it, and now I don't care if someone else sees it.
When I use it, all I can say is that I'm in a bliss. It makes me feel sooo comfortable. I probably sleep better too . For some reason, it makes me feel like a little kid with a set bedtimes.
Now I'm just in a state where I don't care as much about what other people think of my littleness, and I feel that if something comforts me and helps me go on in life in a positive way, then so be it. I plan to get more stuff over time, like this twin-sized toddler bed, and live out life as a little/adult hybrid.
I don't plan to be explicit about my new lifestyle. Diapers and the whole AB side of things will remain secret, but I will be transitioning into childlike adult-sized clothing, shoes, and other little stuff, while still remaining outwardly acceptable (I think/hope).
The most obvious thing that would point to my littlehood would be my bed, and if anyone asks about my little stuff I plan to tell them that I'm just a kid at heart as that has some degree of acceptability. (I may also add that it's a comfort mechanism, depending on who it is.)
So, instead of trying to hide and quash my little side, I have set it free, and I am much happier because of it.