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Autism, Cerebral Palsy, and being an Adult Baby...#60

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I will admit to more feelings of being lonely and misunderstood as an Autistic with Cerebral Palsy who is also an "Adult Baby". It has been 1 1/2 months since a major misunderstanding erupted online where I got trashed as a person, by others who were "posing" as another Autistic, who was female, whom I do know is a Lesbian and an "Adult Baby" like myself. It was the female Lesbian Autistic "Adult Baby's" disability support persons who did the interfering and "destroyed" the friendship. As far as I have been able to logically deduce, I have found no further trace of this other Autistic person online on the Internet in the last 1 1/2 months. It seems that she has been permanently cut off from accessing the Internet ever again.

I live a life of loneliness and isolation, which hardly ever seems to abate or change. I do wonder whether I am slowly being driven insane from the severe social isolation I experience. Only about 6 hours per month, do I ever get to sit down face-to-face with other autistics like myself.

I would enjoy having another Autistic adult my own age coming over to my house to interact with me, but as I have mentioned in an earlier weblog entry or two, such a thing seems rather "unrealistic". As my intermittently physically violent and psychotic Mother has screamed @ me for 47 years straight, from the time I was age 3 to age 50 before she dropped dead, that I "never had the right to any friendships or companionships with any other hominid primates - ever".

Where do I fit in?

I suppose I fit-in nowhere...


  1. gigglemuffinz's Avatar
    I don't think that having another auttistic adult your own age interacting with you is a impossible dream. You definitely have a place in the world, and I'm sorry that you've been so lonely lately. I really hope things get better, but I really think your mother is wrong. You have the right to friendships and relationships just like any other person, and deserve to feel like there is a place you belong..
  2. pd8615's Avatar
    I have diagnosed ASD. Not sure if I understand loneliness. I feel more at home in nature or with pets than with people. Though I live alone and spend little time with humans, I don't consider myself lonely. Isolated, that would be true, but lonely not. Just like an artist who is alive when doing art and has little time or interest for 'chatter', I feel best when engrossed in things I am passionate about, not with people who are into stuff I have no interest in.

    As what interests me is of no interest to most people, and what most people are interested in is of little or no interest to myself, why would I want to spend time around others?

    I do though have a need for perhaps what is like a gym workout for my brain. Just as a body that does nothing gets weak and flabby, I desire people to 'exercise' my brain through intelligent conversation. Sadly this is not of interest to most it appears. Talking about what movie star has cellulite is fine but discussing anything of depth is 'boring' or 'negative'.

    Aside from a/b interests, what sort of interests do you get lost in to the point time disappears? It is those sort of intense passions that bring me the most joy. Most humans drain me; my passions energize me.

    What sort of human interaction would you like?

    It is fine if the answer is none. - the Adult Baby / Diaper Lover / Incontinence Support Community. is designed to be viewed in Firefox, with a resolution of at least 1280 x 1024.