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victoria

First time wearing in front of my boyfriend (or anyone!) AND first orgasm of my life!

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It doesn't count as my first time wearing in public, though, or my first time wearing out - i was only in the car with him a few hours. So it wasn't very exciting or anything and I didn't have too much anxiety or fear. I'm completely comfortable around him, we were in the car, and it was very dark.

He knew I was wearing because I have a kidney infection and he's in on the whole thing. He's the one who suggested I wear all the time and not just at night for safety and convenience.

I was asleep when he got to my house and he called me to wake me up and have me come outside (we were going on a burn ride and then we usually sit in the car and chill or do whatever. He had plans so we only had about 2 hours.). My goodnite was wet when I woke up because I, again, have a kidney infection that makes this happen, but I rushed out without changing it, with a few extras in my backpack. We talked for half an hour in some parking lot about some serious stuff (like my eating disorder recovery) and some funny stuff (like our friends) and he showed me some nature pictures he took, when he began to notice me squirming (wet diaper was getting cold), but he didn't pick up on why. He just said, "hey do you wanna get some food?"

I said yeah, but asked if we could go in, and he immediately looked at me with a sly smile and said, "you have to pee dontcha?" I laughed and blushed a bit and told him well, yeah. all the time. (seriously, all the time, kidney infections are a biiiiitch.)

So we drive over to the burger shack and he teases me about putting off going to the toilet and how it isn't smart. I really do have an urgent need to pee, actually, and it's making me fidget a lot, but I'm wearing my goodnite so I kiss him and we start to kiss more passionately and then eventually he goes, "let's get you inside."

"I just wish you didn't have plans so I could have sex with you," I said, and I guess I was sort of whining but GUESS WHAT HE TOLD ME ACTUALLY HE HAD SET ASIDE PLENTY OF TIME WITH ME TO DO WHATEVER!!!

We go inside and I'm not hungry really but I tell him to get me whatever he thinks I'd like that's cheese-free (lactose intolerant!). When I went to the bathroom, i ripped the sides of my (by now soaked) goodnite and threw it in the trash. I was sort of pissed (no pun intended) off I had to take off my shoes and pants to put on the new one - i wish they weren't pull-ups. But I got dressed and went back outside and hugged him while we waited for the food.

He started leaning away from me, to the side, so I let go, and he looks at me and laughs and says, "you thought I was pulling away, didn't you?". I realize he was just rocking back and forth with me like he'd done the other day, when he hummed me the song to try to rock me to sleep when I had a fever. He didn't hum because we were in public, but I still enjoyed it. Anyway, we got our food and went back outside.

I realize this sounds very fetish-story-ish but kidney infections really do make you very thirsty. You get really dehydrated. So we were eating and we shared some fruity canned arizonas (he always, always, always has at least one on him) and then we were smoking (the ganja) and somewhere along the line, the urgency I feel (always, from the infection) like a pinpoint in my pin-prick, feels more…open? Like I pushed it out? And I don't feel a stream or anything but it gets very warm in my goodnite under my leggings, and then as I shift, I feel very soggy and realize what's happened.

But I don't tell him because now we're driving to our 'spot' where we always have sex. He notices I'm squirming again, and he asks me, laughing, like "what the hell, what's up tori". so, I tell him I'm just uncomfortable because it feels like I'm sitting in a wet bathtub. He laughs and says, "Really? Right now?"

And I blush and look down and tell him, "most of the time."

He's fine with it, because he genuinely loves me, and he just chuckles and we go on with our conversation about whatever personal experiences we were talking about (not necessary to the story). Eventually, we park at our spot, and while he's outside taking a leak, I'm smoking a cigarette and climbing into the backseat to meet him because I don't want to go outside in the cold even for a second, haha. Like, my wet diaper would probably freeze instantly or something knowing my life.

We're talking and cuddling while I'm smoking in the back seat and I tell him, just wait okay I need to change. He doesn't understand why this an issue. I say, "it's a pain in the ass to change these" and when he asks why and I tell him, "Well, I have to get completely naked, basically. Like I have to take off my pants and shoes and everything just to change it."

His face flutters a little - disappointment? - and he says, "oh, they're not like, the ones with the sticky things? like the straps? It's just like a pull-up?"

And I'm a little embarrassed, but I say, "Yeah. I can rip the sides open to take it off but to put on another one I have to get all undressed."

He puts out my cigarette, which is almost done, hugs me in a way I can't describe as anything other than 'deeply', and says, "well you're going to be completely naked anyway."

I shrug because I guess that's true, and we keep cuddling, but cuddling turns to snuggling, and snuggling turns to making out, again. Eventually, I go down on him - as always, before we have sex, so he can last longer for me - and I really want to get to it. He's gripping my lower legs and sliding his hands over my padded tush (but very quickly…almost like he doesn't want me to know he knows it's there) to focus mostly on my lower back and my upper thighs. Eventually, he slips his fingers under the waistband of my leggings, and at this point, I hear the diaper rustle and know he has to feel the top of it, so I'm kind of embarrassed and I get off of him and say, "wait, okay, I have to take this off."

He says "okay!". Like what else did I expect him to say.

So I ask him, "where do I put it, though?" and he says, "just leave it outside for now." I realize he's saying this so I'll do it and then forget about it and he won't have to worry about me being insecure about leaving it out in the boonies where we are. (not the wilderness- a parking lot - but still). Anyway, it worked, because it's still there.

I ask him to close his eyes while I do it because I'm embarrassed, and he laughs and says, "fine." But when I glance over at him, I give him a knowing look and call him out.

"You're not going to close your eyes, are you?" I ask, as I pull off my leggings and he sees me in the diaper for the first time, albeit in the dark in a car.

"Not even a little," he says. I rip the sides of the goodnite, pull it off and fold it up before he can see or smell it, open the car door, and place it outside.

Then we get to it. It's not the most incredible sex of my life (we were in a car), but it has one of the most incredible moments of any part of my life, ever - my first orgasm. I won't go into detail obviously but I was really excited about my first one. It was incredible, I didn't even -
ok PG-13 board don't talk about it anymore
but it was incredible

INCREDIBLE

afterward much congratulations and celebration, we cuddle and then he goes outside to get to the driver's seat to pack another bowl. I ask him to hand me my backpack. putting another goodnite on, in the backseat of a car, after you've just had your first orgasm, while you have a kidney infection and a fever - that's hard. and THEN I had to put on all my other clothes, too. Dear god.

He starts to drive me home but I tell him, just hold on a while, I want to have a cigarette. He says, "This is going to be the best cigarette of your life."

I think it was.

He drives super slowly, and we come to a stop in my driveway. Now, I've just had my first big moment and I don't want to leave, so I snuggle up to him and hug him for what seems like forever. He cuddles me back. We talk about a lot of things, there, sitting in my driveway.

I bring up the goodnites a few times, mostly because I'm embarrassed and want reassurance, but he calls me out on talking about them a lot and takes it as a sign of negativity. Eventually, he says, "You know how when I broke my back, I had to wear a brace for 6 weeks?" I nod. "People told me I was the happiest kid in a neck brace." He grabs my face. "I want you to be the happiest girl in diapers!"

That makes sense to me. It's medical and I need them. I just can't help feeling embarrassed. Eventually he starts tickling me (how cliche) and I'm a bit insecure because my stomach is so bloated from eating crap food, but he's tickling me all over and then I slide down out of the seat and get stuck between the seat and the dashboard and have no defense. I'm trying my hardest to push him off (maybe not my hardest ;]) but he keeps tickling me, and eventually, I feel my bladder let go. I ask him seriously to stop and he does.

"Don't tickle me for a couple weeks, okay?" I ask, shifting and uncomfortable in a soggy, swollen goodnite. It feels like i'm sitting in a marsh on a summer day.

He smiles so huge and starts teasing me. "What?" Laughter. "Did you pee?" He grabs my face and smushes it, still teasing. "Did I make you pee?!"

I'm really embarrassed but trying not to smile. we hug a lot more and i tell him I love him and get out of the car.

I know I should be happy about this but I don't feel fulfilled. I just wanted to stay with him after I had my first orgasm. I feel lonely right now, and unfinished. Not whole.

for some reason, I just wish he teased me about my goodnites a bit more. It would have made me feel a lot better. I'd rather him tease me about it (i sort of like it? Is it normal to LIKE being teased and babied like that?) than ignore it. The elephant in my pants is distracting.

I hope I get to have a day where I actually see him for a long time soon.

Updated 13-Jan-2014 at 07:07 by victoria

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Comments

  1. Maxx's Avatar
    litterbug <snicker>
  2. victoria's Avatar
    [QUOTE=Maxx;bt31574]litterbug <snicker>[/QUOTE]
    I feel guilty!!!
  3. Beloney's Avatar
    Yes it's normal. Just communicate with him. Tell him you like the teasing when your in your diaper! Communication is the best. Don't feel guilty.
  4. SoakedinTexas's Avatar
    Maybe you should move up the diaper chain and get some tape on ones.
  5. Lutero's Avatar
    I'm happy to see your boyfriend accepts you and makes you (apparently!) very happy.

    I know all too well how kidney/bladder infections are with urgency and frequency of needing to pee. The last bout I had I was considering camping in the restroom because I was up and down so much, and my god; yes it makes you terribly thirsty,. ugh,


    Anyway; let him know how you feel. I may not know why you can't stay together, but if you'd like that then maybe ask, if he's able I'm sure he will.

    Sounds like you have a lovely partner, Victoria.

    P.S: Stop that smoking! :P
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