LittleHanah is happy to be back but a little sad too :(
by, 06-Jan-2014 at 02:08 (334 Views)
Hello Adisc community.
So I have been on a very very VERY long hiatus. So long that I even forgot how to get into my own account and had to re activate my old email lol!
ahhh so, I went through a couple of big life problems and hurdles and trials. However, I have returned.
I have tried to get rid of my ABDL side, tried to purge, tried everything. And always, when I least expect it, I seem to just without even wanting to, regress.
I have spoken about this before in these forums. About how I seem to regress without wanting to, or meaning to, and it isn't always under my own control.
So I have just learned to accept this about me. Its hard for me to accept this clingy needy, starved for some kind of security and safety part of me.
Very difficult. It makes me sad because, I feel like a little girl in a big body, and sometimes I can be adult, but this little girl is really ...really hurt, and its like someone who hasn't eaten for ever and has been stuck in a desert, and suddenly comes accross this big fountain of water and food....Just realizing how starved I am makes me sad.
Its hard to be a starved child stuck in a big body. Really.
So now that I am accepting it, Im trying to do it in a positive way, a way that helps me rely on myself for adult things and learn to let go and just be for my AB things.
Its a part of me that likely wont leave, and I don't want it too...but I just get emotional about it.
<3 Anyway, on a happy note, I've got a cute cloth dipee, and a new nuk 5 and a few AB goodies on the way for me to enjoy.
Im a little upset also because I ordered a sweater from Privatina.eu, they are really bad at keeping in touch, I sent them like 10 messages asking them if my order went through, never got anything back from them, I haven't had one minute detail said to me about the status of my package, and my payment already went through.
To all you AB's struggling, feel free to message me, and I'd be happy to share my experiences in my own AB life and accepting it as a part of me. I'm still learning but I'm happy to talk to any of you fabulous little ones <3
phew, on a happy note, I'm glad to be back, I could use a few shoulders to lean on , what better than adisc blog shoulders heehee