tyty20

ugh i really just need to vent so please i apologize now if im a bit annoying.

so today is september 19th. one year ago today my grandfather died and a year and half before that my grandmother died. so today it all hit me again. im crying and im so stressed. i idk where to start really. i just i need a friend i need a hug. i have my teddy bear my hubby just bought me and i have my bobo but right now not even those can comfort me. my hubby isnt home hes dealing with work stuff and the kids are playing so i cant let them know im sad. would any one like to talk. i just need to talk about anything to distract me. who has advice on loss. i know they were my grandparents but they were my world. they did everything for me and my sisters. my parents took care of us but my grandpa and grandma meant more to me and when i lost my grandma (few days after my 18th birthday ) i fell apart. i had just told her i got into college and she was so proud of me she had called my grandpa (who at the time was in a rehabilitation facility for his foot. so she called him saying ill see you tomorrow morning. and she didnt make it. she had passed in her sleep. she had pictures of me and my sisters and grandpa by her bed and just left. she was very ill. so im happy she went peacefully. my grandpa on the other hand was not as lucky. he was very ill as well in and out of hospitals and nursing homes and he had passed in the hospital. i would have been there if i had known how sick he was. even tho i was 9 months pregnant i would have found a way to him.


okay well i just wanted to vent and now i cant even finish im so ... idk

thanks for listening. i really hope someday things will be okay