who am I?
by
, 05-Sep-2013 at 01:14 (468 Views)
Little Kerry is so confuuuuuused!
See here's the thing: whenever I thought of myself as a Little before--and I've told you that such thoughts in the past were pretty nebulous--I always saw myself in the "baby" role. In college, that is certainly the role I played whenever I could role play. In the stories I have written, the ones that appeal to me the most are the ones involving someone treating someone else like a baby or someone taking on or regressing to a baby role. That is also true in the fiction I choose to read.
Yet...
I'm really not much interested IRL in remaining in a baby state for long periods of time; I don't think I can clear my mind that effectively, and if it isn't clear the game seems too much like a game...too artificial, too forced. So I told my Daddy that I thought Little Kerry was most likely 2-3 years old sometimes and other times a little bit older, say 4-5 with a wetting problem. But I've started to try to role play it all and I don't know how to do it! I mean I've brought up three children, and as far as I can recall they all went through these stages, so why can't I find the right frame of mind to make it work? I thought maybe it was the diapers--too adult--so tonight I tried putting on my last remaining Teddy, but it didn't change anything.
Maybe we need a designated playroom. If we do, this is doomed: the townhouse is way too small and my kids are way too often here for that ever to happen. And ultimately I guess I just don't know if I am a toddler or a little girl. And I can't figure out why I don't know. Seems a basic question I ought to be able to answer.
How can I help my vanilla hubby to be a daddy if I don't even know what it is that I want?