dead giveaway overreactions
by, 23-Jan-2013 at 04:01 (442 Views)
one day while i was in high school i was hanging out with my friend scott. scott was playing a game on his computer, and i was sitting on his bed reading a magazine. i noticed that between scott's bed and his wall he had a small piece of luggage and a small piece of bright neon pink/red fabric was peeking out of it. i was interested, and pulled on it. the top ("boobs part") of a skinny-teenage-girl-sized two-piece swimsuit came out of the luggage. i held it up, and said "ooh! what's this?!"
and scott *freaked out*. he turned bright red in the face. it suddenly seemed like nothing on earth or in heaven could have slowed him down from his quest to (1) get that out of my hand, (2) get that back in that luggage, (3) put that luggage somewhere else, and (4) change the conversation topic. whatever he distracted my attention with, i don't know, it wasn't important. his impressively strong reaction was the important part.
he could have said, "oh, my friend melissa left that here, i've been meaning to give it back to her." or he could have even said "it's a gift for my cousin." instead, his reaction left me with the distinct impression that i had done something highly embarrassing and i was in possession of something personally valuable. it was about scott's size. i figure it was his, and he liked to wear it. he was never interested in discussing it, and i wasn't interested enough to ask.
fast-forward to mid-2000, when i lived alone in an apartment. i was on my computer when my friends billy and eric stopped by. i went to the living room to hang out and eventually started doing the dishes. eric decided to use my computer without asking me. even if he had asked, i would have said yes, because i had completely forgot that I had left icq logged in. (if you never used it, icq was the first big "instant messaging client" before aol bought them out and even before that term was popular.) i had shared my icq user-id on some ab/dl websites. while eric was using my computer, someone chose that moment to message me. as i'm doing the dishes, eric walks up and says "hey, this guy on icq wants to know if you're the whisko who likes to wear diapers."
and i *freaked out*. red-faced and with hands still dripping with dish soap, i rushed to find out who messaged me and close icq. i then stammered that it was some stupid and unappreciated inside joke. i could have said "uh, no. who's asking?" in retrospect, my reaction was a giant flashing neon sign that there was some truth to that statement. (i guess i could have also said "yup" and kept right on doing the dishes. i think my evasive actions probably made that just as obvious.) eric eventually lived with me for a few months, and if he knew or suspected anything, he wasn't interested enough in my possible "liking to wear diapers" to bring it up.
so, as an exercise, imagine being placed in that kind of circumstance. if you intend not to be suspicious, have a plan for how you will respond in case the subject comes up!