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Dave

Masks

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I have been wearing a mask to perpetuate the persona that people in my area believe is the real me. I feel like the mask is becoming like the mask in the Goosebumps book and it is getting stuck to me. I want to be able to be my self in college because no one there knows me or expects me to act that way that I am currently expected to act, but this mask is getting harder and harder to get out of. I hate this person that is supposed to be me I feel like two people stuck in one body. However one side is something that I don't want to be at all, I just used those mannerisms so that people wouldn't bother me or cause drama. I got myself into a strange place and the only solution is college in less than 5 days
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  1. xdeadx's Avatar
    [COLOR="Green"]Look. I used to do this. I mean... Like all the time. And... Well needless to say it's bad to do this, because you sometimes become what that mask is. And when you do, after a while you feel like... Damn why did I say/do that!?! It's hard to take these masks off... It really is, but the best thing to do is do things little by little. Take it off slowly. And... being with friends helps a lot. I hhung out with the "in" crowd less often and started hanging out with the people I liked more. And well... Soon I just stopped hanging out with the football players, cheerleaders, dancers and started hanging out with my own friends "click" and... I like it so much more. And then, I eventually completely took my mask off. I am who I want to be now. And... I just gotta say, It helps when you are with who you see as a friend. It's much easier. [/COLOR]
  2. Samaki's Avatar
    Me personally, i used to hang out with the cool group a lot, I pretty much was bitch slapped everyday, they thought of gays as horrible people (this was back when I didn't exactly know i was gay, but I was starting to think I might be) and they really messed me up. I finally just said **** it, and went over to the "weirdo" group, I fell in love with them the instant I met them, and I started to act more like me, I became a bit more feminine, not enough to make people think I was gay though. I loved them all, and would do anything for them (except Michelle, she got her GF to punch me in the face because apparently I said I was going to rape her O.o).

    It was hard really being myself, and if I were you, I would do what Blake said, go hang with the people you actually like, you find that it's not as hard to change as you thought it was.
  3. Dave's Avatar
    Yeah I think due to current events I am going full out the reverse of the way I was heading.
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