feeling ashamed of my AB side
by, 20-Aug-2011 at 16:05 (673 Views)
Exactly a week ago to day i was promoting an LGBT (lesbian gay bisexual transgender) youth support group in 1 of the local parks to me and it was going gr8 we had T-shirts on that had the groups message on that its ok to be different.
me and two other people promoting the group got a rainbow painted on our face by some 1 who had a face painting stall there that day
soon after we got the painting done we went for lunch break in town and we bumped in to a old school friend of mine who i had not seen in seven years the two girls who were with me also new my old school friend as they go to the same college as him,
any way im getting off track
me and my old school friend(im keeping him nameless just because i feel it best to) swap numbers and arranged to hang out at his mum and dads house on the 15th of august any way we did and it was grate fun
but seeing his room with no remnants of child hood present it has made me hide all my AB related things and childish things and i feel sick to my stomach that i indulge in the AB fantasy i don't deserve it why couldn't have a normal fetish or no need for a fetish i feel at this point i should point out i have romantic feelings for this old school friend who is straight so i no we can be nothing but friends he is coming to mine(well my mum and dads house) on the 23rd of august.
i just want him to see me as normal as he is we clearly live very differently but two things that we have in common is cerebral palsy and a love for crime fiction