by, 16-May-2008 at 02:59 (1146 Views)
I'm having an internal conflict gone external. I love my gf, I really do, and she's my mommy and understands my infantalism and my desire to crossdress. I'm thankful I found some1 like her and would be devastated if I lost her, but that's not what I came her to talk about. At first when I told her I wanted to be a full time girl, she did everything in her power to stop me. I told her constantly it's out of her power and she eventually loosened up. But since then, she's seems to always see me as a boy and she says she'll continue doing that cause I biologically am one. So what!!!??!! My personal decision is "f**k being a guy!!" and nothing or no one can change that. If that's not bad enough, she always makes me feel sad, upset, left out, ect. She's always rambling on about her skirts, dresses, high heels, make up, how pretty/beautiful she is, ect. She can never share what that feels like me. She can be so selfish when it comes to that. If she ever does, she never really means it. She always plays around with me and that's fine but when it comes to this, she just doesn't know when to stop.
I told her time and time again that what she does makes me feel sad and left out, but she always seems to ignore that and continue with her games. I'm lost and don't know if I should leave her and find someone else who will succeed where she failed or keep her for the time being. Coming out to anyone about my TG issues is very risky.
In a Nutshell, she knows how bad I want to be a girl and be identified as one. However, she never really take this seriously. I can't make her do this and I'm well aware of that but it would make me so much happier if she just took my TG issues more seriously. Boy is like all she sees in me. Always boy this and boy that!! Anyone have any advice for my little jam?