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Day in the life of...

Prison-block love. (1/28/08)

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Perhaps this will teach me never to ask about too many details...

Rance: "I see on here that you've violated your probation, sir. May I ask what caused the violation?"

Convict: "I beat somebody up, man."

Rance: "I'm going to need a bit more detail. Had you been given a good reason to physically retaliate against the victim, such as for your own self-defense."

Convict: "Not really."

Rance: "If you can give me details, please..."

Convict: (He shuffles uncomfortably in his chair.)"I ... well..."

Rance: "Yes, sir?"

Convict: "So we had this guy in the bathroom of the cells, but I wasn't doing any of the sick stuff, man! I mean, they put a plunger into his mouth and started plugging a broom-stick up his rear-end. I didn't do nothing sexual, though! I just punched him in his face about ten times."

Rance: (A bit shocked and surprised.)"... Yup, that will violate probation, right there, but I'm glad to see that you were the reasonable one in the situation."

Convict: "Well, I don't think it should violate my probation."

Rance: (doubtful.) "Why is that, sir?"

Convict: "Because -- and I ain't lyin', man! -- he enjoyed it up until I pounded his face."
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Comments

  1. Kraiden's Avatar
    Oh Rance, this is one blog I'll definately be keeping up to speed with, honeybuns. ^_~

    and lol @ the convicts. WE NEED A HOMOSEXUAL EX-CONVICT BATTLE TRAIN! With PLUNGERS!
  2. Raccoon's Avatar
    Oh, yeah me too. Ever since they ended all my literate but oh-so-violent shows (Oz, Sopranos, Black Donnelys) I have had nowhere to get my fix. *sniff* But now there's Rance's Blog! Yay!
  3. andysetra's Avatar
    pics or it didn't happ---wait, no...nevermind...I believe him
  4. kite's Avatar
    yeah, please. no pics. i think we're cool on that.
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