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My Problems being ABDL

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unfortunately I have problems being an abdl and ill address them here. I would appreciate help please ahaha.

I still live with my parents who are strict. not in a 'you must be the house slave' strict but they type that if I told them I wanted to wear diapers they would think theres something wrong with me and wouldn't let me indulge in this lifestyle. I cannot open up to my girlfriend purely because she is innocent and I wouldn't want to ruin anything with us because she is the sweetest person on this earth and I love her to bits. I feel that if I wanted to be Abdl Id want to do it on my own. yes I won't lie I would loveeeeee to be lying on the floor and have my gf put a Paci in my mouth and proceed to change me but unfortunately it won't happen. Now after this I know what abdl products I want to buy. getting them shipped to a pick up point is no problem and I think now most Abdl stores have discreet packaging so I'm. not worried. what I am worried about is billing. when I was 13 my parents thought I would be mature enough to have a debit card so after a while I had one. however I went on a lil spending spree. I bought a top with the bee movie script on it. I bought cards against humanity. but after a while my 300 bank account ended up at 0. none the less mum and dad weren't too happy so when I did get another debit card at 16 they were able to monitor what I spend my money on my card on. now Im older I know they wouldn't spy on my purchases but I think they've forgotten to disable their access to my spending history and I'm worried that if I buy my abdl items it'll come up 'Purchase from -abdlmarketplace' and then they'd google abdl and I'm in the shiz. please I need so much help about this!!!!!

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