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Trying to be as positive as I used to be a few years ago. . .

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Reading through a few old messages someone sent me on Facebook, a message caught my eye. I'll hyphen-point the main points of what they said... It inspired me to try again on getting more mentally healthy or at least manage it better. No idea why I decided to look at old messages but I'm glad I did.

-You always find a way to make a situation positive, even if it's only a little bit better than it was, I appreciate the effort.
-Every time you make a pun despite me acting upset; I actually love every single one. They make me laugh even when I don't want to; heck when I see or hear one it reminds me of you.
-You have a depth that most people don’t, the people I know are so shallow and selfish it sucks.
-You’re an observer like me, You notice things average people wouldn't even bother to, the things that matter, but mean nothing to most people.
-You like to make other people happy even at the cost of your own happiness, I couldn't do that even though I'm not happy to begin with. I think it's a good thing, but you deserve to be happy too.
-You have this way about you, I don't know how to describe it other than you're a welcoming person.
-You’re nice to people even if they’re complete a**holes.
-You think the best even when you’re given the worst.
-You give off an overall feeling of selflessness, kindness, and comfortableness.
-You’re not like other people at all, you strive to genuinely care. I'm tired of people not giving a sh**.

Why does this motivate me out of all things? I can't say but I'm glad it did. I can't stand being this way... I'm sure my friends and family are sick of it too. People care and love me but I know I can be hard to take sometimes. I want to blame myself for not being completely mentally healthy, but I know that it isn't my fault for something far beyond my control.
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  1. Marka's Avatar
    I don't know how I miss these and, I hate that I do miss them! What's it going to take for you to know the truth about you? I'm not talking about what you may be trapped in feeling; I'm talking about what you must know - you must know! You have the gift, it only hurts because you continue to deny it - in so doing, you deny that gift to others yet, as you've seen in your example; a few others see it too! They may not understand the greater meaning of it yet, they know that you are gifted - will you continue to deny your gift? Adam, it's time to rise above the superficiality of your self, as an island of despair - all you need do is to accept the gift and begin your work here in this life. Time is not infinite for us - accept your gift, that you may begin to give it in it's wholeness to others too!
    It's not yours to keep to yourself alone yet, it is on you to accept it for yourself before, you can truley use it for the greater good! Please! Accept your gift, we need you now more than ever!

    My best,
    -Marka
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