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Songnar

Wheeeeeee, but not in a great way

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Man, life is an emotional roller coaster sometimes, isn't it!?

I found out semi-recently that my sweetheart wants an open relationship - she wants to be polyamorous; and I'm trying to be supportive 'cos, hey, she doesn't give me crap for my weird kinks, right? Damn if it's not hard to swallow, though. I mean... is it okay if I'm having a hard time not feeling betrayed? I know it doesn't mean she loves me any less but it DOES mean there's less time for me (of what little time there already is.) What if she gets an STI? What if she ends up pregnant with some stranger's baby!?!? <sigh> I guess all I can really do is play along... I mean, I HAVE been bi-curious for awhile. Maybe this is my chance to experiment.

I've been trying to meet other AB/DL's in the DFW area and I feel like I'm having some success, so that's nice.

It all just kind'a makes me want to go drown in a bottle of whiskey, though.

C'est la vie. I'll live.
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Comments

  1. KimbaWolfNagihiko's Avatar
    Disclaimer: I have no experience with real-life relationships, but I'll take a crack at this...

    Obviously, this is a VERY large move to make in a relationship, and one that needs the careful consideration of all involved. Everyone's feelings need to be out in the open. I think what you are feeling right now is perfectly normal and to be expected. Personally, polyamory/polygamy etc. is one lifestyle that I do not agree with. You'll need to look deep inside yourself to think this over and come to a decision about whether you yourself can be comfortable with and support it. You may even want to seek out some form of couples' counseling to cover all bases. In the end you just don't want anyone hurt.
  2. Maxx's Avatar
    No way I'd go along with something like this. Maybe it would feed some fantasies, but if push came to shove, it'd be a dealbreaker. I'm too much of a germophobe to go along with eating somebody else's sandwich. Is that mayonnaise... or what?
  3. AdorableRabbit's Avatar
    Wow... that's tough!

    I know you're trying to be even handed, but personally I couldn't do that. I think not all people are cut out for the same things.

    Does your sweetheart enjoy everything about your little side the same? I doubt it. There was likely some give and take? Some things are also best in the mind... Does she want sex with others, or relationships, because personally I think I could wrap my head around the former (and find ways to satisfy from roleplay to swinging), but the latter I'm just not built for...

    I agree you need to be honest with your feelings. Good luck!

    Sounds like a brown bottle prescription is not uncalled for... don't drown though!
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