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My Worst Year

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This blog post is not meant to be depressing, or cause drama, or any issues whatsoever. This is simply to reflect on the worst year I've ever had - 2016. Some of you might be feeling the same thing for yourself, but I feel mine is unique just like your own.

The start of 2016, January 18th, at 8 PM CST - there was... "stuff" found on my computer by my boyfriend, whom I will call "Sam". Now before you jump to conclusions, read ahead: Sam was over at my house and I had to leave for an hour in order to go to a therapy session. I let him stay at my place and play on my PlayStation. I generally keep my computer turned on (and unlocked) due to the fact I have nothing on my computer (or so I thought) that could raise concern. Sam admittedly was being snoopy and wanted to check out my computer and came along this "stuff" in a folder, I can not recall where it was folder-wise. When I got home and took him home, he confronted me about it, and then I got home and he helped me look for said files while on Skype. Long story short, he contacted police and I was questioned at home by the police. They asked me if I'd be willing to go with them to the station. I complied as I was not under arrest nor in any trouble at the time.
Fast forward an hour later, after being questioned they put me in cuffs in order to transport me to the local Detective Bureau in order to question me there. They had me sign papers for them to have permission to look into my computer, cellphone, flash drives, Cloud accounts, among other things. Again, I had nothing to hide as I knew that this “stuff” had nothing to do with me other than the fact it somehow got on my laptop. While I was there, in a small room, the detective walked in and out in order to take calls back and forth between the person that was looking in my computer and other things, and myself in order to ask me questions, he seemed to not believe me right away. They found this “stuff” as well on the computer. If you fast forward several hours later, until 2 AM in the morning, I was then being transported to the local county jail and placed in jail clothing temporarily while they were doing the process of booking me (which took 3 hours), getting fingerprinted, asked about medical history, both physical and mental. I was afterwards taken to my jail cell and stripped completely naked as I wasn’t allowed to have anything that could be potentially dangerous to myself due to my mental history (having been diagnosed with major depressive disorder and severe anxiety). Out of the 3-4 days, I probably only got a few hours of sleep. For the most part, I was up trying to figure out whether I was going to get out or whether I could make a phone call. The very last day of my stay in the jail there, I was not fed, and spoke to a lawyer that I had never met before. My parents had gotten me a lawyer in order to talk to me and at least give me some sort of outside contact as to what’s going on. My thoughts were “I wish they didn’t get me a lawyer, because they can’t afford to live a good life if they have to spend their money on me,” and I thought my situation was hopeless considering I complied the whole time, and never even knew how the “stuff” got on my computer in the first place – I didn’t know how I was going to prove my innocence. My lawyer told me how I faced up to 5 years in prison and permanently on the sex offender list. Luckily, that very same day, I was released (I was not bailed out) due to no charges having been filed. A few days later, I found out the “raw charges” were immediately dropped due to the fact that they were able to find that this “stuff” was remotely transferred and traced back to another location outside of the country. That’s all I know in regards to that situation, but I can say that I was very traumatized from the situation, but I have completely forgiven Sam.

A short few months later, my brother decided to leave the family with his brainwashed wife and my nephew (his son). Both of my parents have been very affected by this due to the amount of stress and issues that have gone on already, and still continue to be affected by the son they raised for 22 years, and the grandson they raised mostly themselves for 2 years. My mother sees a psychologist due to the fact that this has happened.
Sam is currently and has been in the state psychiatric hospital for a few weeks now due to a schizophrenic episode, which we weren’t even aware he had schizophrenia. Hopefully he’ll get out soon, but he does seem to be doing better.
I’ve also gotten fired in early November – I won’t get into details, but I plan to pursue some sort of action against the company legally. For a whole month I was unemployed and later found a brand new job, and 2 weeks into the job I found out I was going to get laid off in early February. We did get a new client in order to save our jobs, and I had the top score on the site, so I’m currently secure with my job, but I will say that this has been the worst and craziest year of my life. And I haven’t even mentioned the small parts of this year that added up.
Anyways, to wrap up this post, I would like to mention I’m doing much better now and have willingly let go of my past and hope to have a better future. The only thing that I still struggle with letting go is what my brother has done to my family, more specifically to my parents, because it hurts to see them hurting. Thank you all for reading. I know this wasn’t the best formatted post, but hopefully this gives you an idea of the kind of stuff that’s happened.


Connor AKA Saoirse

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