Making the switch
by, 07-Nov-2016 at 19:29 (150 Views)
As many of you know life I filled with difficult decisions some of which can effect upon others around you, This is why I am not afraid to tell you my story that may help you.
Prior to 2010, I was a healthy adult male in his late 20-30's who enjoyed life but was not ready to face what happened next in my young life.
Okay where to begin?, well six years ago if anyone had have told me that I would be wearing diapers under my regular clothing instead of underwear or with just a cotton t-shirt/vest at nights simillar to what I did when I was a toddler/infant all those years ago in the 1980's I would have laughed at that thought as a joke although the reality is something that I never thought would happen to me in my 30's but having seid all that I always have had problems with continence although be it milder when I was younger due to epileptic seizure's suffered from when I was 12-13 years old in 1992/1993 this is thankfully something that I don't have nowadays although it left me with permanently irriversable neurological damage to the muscles that are in control over my bladder.
And the fact that I will probebly have to be in diapers for the rest of my life was something that when I thought about it filled me with dread and embarrassment and humiliation that my body was betraying me I could probably also put that one down to the fact I was a ex hevy drinker of alcoholic beverages which I misused when I was younger because of verious traumas in my life which I still have today although I have all but given up on the alcohol, you see trust me she I say it's complicated when I describe how and why I came to be in diapers as a fully mature adult male.
Although deep down somewhere in my soul there probably is a baby or toddler who now rejoices in the fact he doesn't have to hide anymore because he's been a part of my life now for six years this being my inner child and I have learned to listen to him although don't have a split personality or anything it is not the same as being crazy but I think I wouldn't describe myself as being totally sane because I have lost my mind a couple of times due to psycalogical and emotional breakdowns caused by extreme stress and or bullying which I have been the victim of for my whole life and which has left me baddly scarded in terms of my psycalogical state and that has left me with post traumatic stress syndrome and other problems including severe depression.
Making the switch back to diapers wasn't a easy decision because it meant having to re-learn what it felt like to start over again in terms of being totally reliant on diapers for the second time in my life and the fact that its permanent is something I had to come to terms with or I would have gone even more crazy than I am today and loosing part of my manhood was a bitter pill to swallow as it meant having to regress back to becoming a toddler or something like that although six years later I am all the more convinced that I have made the right decision/choice because it has helped save me from countless wet-nights or other embarrassing accidents because of the fact I have essentially become un-potty trained and this I something that I never planned for in my life.
Although quite frankly speaking I don't care anymore because it is mow a part of my daily routine and I wouldn't have it any other way because it has forced me to become a better person than I used to be because I am far less stressed and grouchy and I sleep much better now that I am in diapers like a kid again and this has improved my life considerably from what it was before and quite honestly I can't ever see myself going back to what I was before all this happened because the person I was before is dead in terms of he's no longer a part of me due to the fact I have moved on from that way of life to where I am today at this present time being 36 years of age and diapered like an infant.