Autism, Cerebral Palsy, and being an "Adult Baby"...#300
by, 17-Mar-2016 at 03:57 (184 Views)
Just a long day...
I had to be an adult.
I had an important meeting of my local Autistic Self Advocacy Network Chapter down in Boston, Massachusetts.
I returned home at ~ 9:30 PM.
I need to "regress" and be a baby.
But, I am still feeling too much like a typical adult as an older developmentally disabled person.
I did write and mailed off a letter to my only surviving elderly Aunt who lives in Tewksbury, Massachusetts.
Yes, even though I am autistic, I do have extended family connections.
She is my late Mom's little sister.
Not much else happened today.
Tomorrow morning I have some house chores to perform.
Then I can have some quiet playtime alone by myself.
I am both "Adult" and "Little Boy" in the same body.
I admit to always being socially very immature.
But, when I had intermittent employment from 1978 to 2001, I faked being a "normal" functional adult.
I admit, that the stress of trying to "function" in adult employment became too much for me at times.
I made too many social functioning mistakes which got me fired from employment too many times.
On the one hand, I feel sad that I am not employed, but socially functioning at the level of an 8 year-old boy made it inevitable that I would not succeed at adult employment, and that I would be better-off with respect to my cognitive mental health to be permanently out of the workforce and "retired" on disability to simply be a little boy.
Yes, in a way I am happier now, not employed, and my mental health has improved considerably.