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BenTennyson

Partners anyone?

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I recently read about a guy who found out by accident that his *wife* propably would never accept his AB/DL side and he decided to quit wearing dydees.
I was afraid of that too but I could never bend and twist my soul like that. It would hurt too much. I am who I am and even tho I love my wife, if she would one day decide to spring to the other side of the acceptance scale, I would propably leave. I would have to. Sorry darling.
You didn't marry me for my silk tiger thong but for my heart and soul. You can't only have that tiny part that makes me a man.

(edit: swapped maiden for wife. oops vocabulary error. no pun intended )
Tags: free-will
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  1. BenTennyson's Avatar
    Well, Note, I read your comment anyway due to instant email notification. Darn default setting :P
    Can't make up my mind though, who exactly your comment was directed to. Me, my wife or both?
  2. gigglemuffinz's Avatar
    Can't help but feel like this situation is always a bit more complicated then this sort of thing implies. Perhaps it's the asexual in me talking, but a fetish of any kind doesn't feel worth someone that you supposedly love with all your heart? I've always been someone who is a strong believer that one can be an AB or a Little without the diapers too. If it's just the diapers they have a problem with, I personally feel like saying "I love my this article of clothing more then you".. implies all sorts of sad stuff.

    Obviously the situation you could be describing is totally different though.
  3. BenTennyson's Avatar
    You're right and what that guy wrote sounded exactly like you said, that it were just the diaper part.
    For me, the situation is totally hypothetical. My wife *currently* accepts both the fetish as well as the AB/little side of myself. People change though.
    I was implying that if she wouldn't accept my AB side, I'd leave. If it was just the diapers... I don't know. A fetish is also a part of yourself and I dare rating it just as valuable as any other part of your soul.
    I'd at least try to live without them of course. However for some people the desire of a fetish is so strong that it might imply mental/emotional problems to be forced to live without it. Yep thats the point where a fetish becomes unhealthy and people tend to say to get help. But can you treat a fetish away? Can you treat homosexuality?
    Srsly if she told me to "drop the diaper" - TODAY I wouldn't know how it would turn out.
  4. boobybird89's Avatar
    Being gay isn't a fetish though. Treating a fetish isn't much difference than treating an addiction, it isn't far from that.. particularly if you leave someone because they can't accept it.
  5. BenTennyson's Avatar
    So... would you say its unhealthy or selfish when I say that I value fetish(es) as part(s) of myself that I don't want to seperate myself from? Not being pushy, I'm really interested in your opinions.

    My whole life I felt neglected by most of my surrounding and not accepted as who I am. When I finally moved out of my parents house and finished my professional training, it seemed like freedom embraced me and I could at last be who I really am and live my life like I wanted it to be. This is part of the reason why I don't like to be told what to do and have problems with authority. If my wife started to criticise here and there and tried to cut me like a plant, I would be back in what I thought had at last left behind in life. I can't have that.
    Maybe it wouldn't be about the fetish itself but just this.

    Interestingly enough, on the sexual side I am the exact opposite - quite submissive. As an AB maybe not so surprisingly. But this is propably not the place to talk about that.
  6. boobybird89's Avatar
    That question is for you to answer, only person that knows you is yourself.
  7. Trevor's Avatar
    The way I see it, either side can refuse to compromise and is ending things because of a diaper. How far one is willing to go in compromise is the tricky and very individual bit. Being at least tolerant seems to me to be such a small gesture of good will that I can't find fault with someone who breaks it off when it will not be provided. We all have strange quirks, and if your partner can't at least tolerate them (and vice versa), you're not well-suited.
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