Finding a Caretaker

[Alornotter]

Ah, every adult baby's dream. Finding that special someone willing to take care of you and treat you as you "real" age. I have been a caretaker now going on 10 years and I tell you it has been a roller coaster of a ride. I have have good cubs and bad baby's, furry and non, and I can tell you I truly enjoy taking care of others. Maybe that's why i became a nurse, who knows. To this day not a week goes by, however, that I don't get at least 3 new requests from people asking me to be their Daddy. Now I for one and willing to give everyone a chance, but sadly most of these meetings end poorly. So I figured I'd toss out a few tips for those people seeking someone to take care of them or just too shy to ask.

Rule 1: Tell me your real age. Do not ask to be "babysat" by a legal adult if you are a minor. I cannot stress this enough folks, Paraphillic Infantilism is considered a fetish. If you are underage and RPing this with an adult, they can get into big trouble. So please be honest about your age up front or wait until your 18.

Rule2: Daddy needs time to himself I love taking care of my little ones, I really do, but I am human too. I have a life outside of this scene. Just because you see your Daddy or Caretaker online does not mean they automatically want to babysit you. Just like a real child, you can be exhausting. So please, no clingy babies.

Rule 3: Give a little, Take a little There are those of us, who prefer the caretaking role. That being said, the vast majority of caretakers are AB's themselves. Most do not want to play the role of the doting parent all the time. If your caretaker is like this, please do some role reversal. It will keep your relationship fresh and keep both of you satisfied.

Rule 4: Money Doesn't Grow on Trees There is nothing I like better than taking care of my charges. I might even get them gifts here and there, be it artwork, or occasionally something nicer (example: I bought one of my cubs a pacifier from pacifiersrus.com). If you caretaker does this for you, know it is a nice gesture. No matter the role I play, I am NOT your parent. It is not my responsibility to provide your needs. Just like many artists hate requests for free work, so do we hate requests to constantly buy you things.

Rule 5: Goo goo, gaa gaa Baby talk is adorable, I use it frequently to make my little ones feel small. However I don't use it all the time, ecspecially in online RP. It gets hard to read and slows things down. Please if your taking the time to type something out make it legible. Your Mommy or Daddy will appreciate it.

Rule 6: Act your age Nothing kills a session with me more than when an AB takes a role beyond its specification. If your playing an adult being treated as a baby then adult things are fine. However if your playing as an actual toddler or physically regressed into one, please note that most caretakers will find it unseemly to have "adult" play with you. It makes me extremely uncomfortable when I see a session heading in this direction and I will end it immediately if I do.

That being said I sure many of you have your own guidelines when looking for a Mommy or Daddy. Hopefully, I gave you some insight into what it means to for us. As always is you have any questions feel free to PM me here or on FA.

Take Care
-Alorn

[AnnBabygurl]

This should be a sticky! Very informative!

[CharliePup]

This seems more like ways to help a caretaker/cub relationship work out, but it's still very useful information! Perhaps I can add a little something.

If you're looking to attract the attention of a 'Mommy'/'Daddy', you have to remember that (especially if you're male, and ESPECIALLY especially if you're seeking a Mommy) the fact that you're an AB who wants their love and attention is not in itself a unique thing. It may sound harsh, but if your best attribute (the one you 'sell yourself' with) is that you're an AB seeking a parent, you aren't going to be very in demand. It's better to be a whole, complete person who has a little side to them.

The best thing to do in my experience is make friends, bond with people with all of yourself, and then see if someone clicks. Some people start out seeing themselves as only AB and gradually start to feel more like caretakers, even if only to certain special people. That's not to say you should play a 'long game' with people (making friends so they might, eventually, be your parent), more an example of how when you stop desperately seeking a Mommy/Daddy and focus on just 'being you', you sometimes find what you were looking for in the strangest of places. (A bit like how people talk about finding a partner when you stop looking).

Most of this advice applies mainly to those caretakers who have only one or two very special cubs, but there are other wonderful caretakers who adopt often and sometimes indiscriminately. I would still advise you to be 'more than a baby' though, even if the person seems happy to adopt another 'child'. As the OP mentioned, caretakers definitely appreciate when you treat them like more than faceless robots who change your dips. I have had many bad experiences with littles treating me like 'Mommy-on-tap' and not a human being.

[Ronbeast]

I think this is excellent, very well written advice. I am personally only an AB, but I do have a caretaker (My girlfriend!). So, I know just how important it is to take breaks from this fetish and just hang out like a regular couple. It's natural to just sit back and unwind, be an adult for a little while.

One thing I see all too often on AB/DL sites is caretakers being bombarded by endless streams of emails and creeper comments, so I'm sure it can be very difficult to be a caretaker.I love to give mommy the time to get away from it all; In fact, I usually just wait for her to ask if I'd like to ageplay, whenever she is ready I'm right there waiting.

I'd hate to be a caretaker and have somebody expecting me to buy everything for them (Small toys or whatever wouldn't be so bad). That would just kill the session for me personally. I'd feel exploited and I would think very hard on whether or not to even see that person again. If they are so desperate for the love and attention, they shouldn't force you to shell out all of your hard-earned money to make them happy.

-Ron

-Ron

[DylanK]

Love it, I need to take advantage of rule 2 more often as a CT, but I've never been inundated with too many people to CT by email at the same time. Although it has happened in chat, but then I usually point them in another direction ^_^

[BabyKaylaBear]

Hi,

I am new to this site, but not to being an AB/babyfur. Being a female irl, I can appreciate some of the endless requests for being someone's mommy. So many in this interest seem to care only for themselves. While I don't oppose to taking turns, it can become tiring to only play one-side.

[FievelFulgoreAB93]

This thread should be an absolute must-read for pretty much everybody in the ADISC community!!!

[misscrissy78]

Ron I love your attitude. For me as a mommy to my boyfriend I enjoy it more when its my idea to play then when i am pressured/guilted into doing it. May I ask how often you play, and how long you wait for her to ask before you get immpatient; assuming you do.

[MilesTheFox88]

I'd like to find a caretaker too. But I want to know how to do it myself in case I meet one who wants to switch roles.

[DylanK]

I'd like to find a caretaker too. But I want to know how to do it myself in case I meet one who wants to switch roles.

There is a how to be a caretaker article coming up but basically the easiest thing' to do is think of what you'd want someone to do for you if the rolls were reversed and do that for them

And finding a CT just takes time ^_^ give it a while