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Thread: Am I his Mommy?

  1. #21
    Diaper Lover


    Let me tell you for me this is mostly a side thing. Not like a fetish that I like on the side but rather part of something bigger of who I truly am.

    I can't say for your boyfriend but for me I do have problems with my parents but I'm sure others have the same problems as well. It's not like I was abused or spoiled/sheltered. It's just something that I've developed and part of who I am. Maybe though, you should set some boundaries and limits as well as talking about it to find out the underlying things to try and understand each other more.

    For me though, the girlfriend/wife/mommy (during playtime, not biological) of my dreams would also have other interests than infantilism. You can't just focus on the sex or you'll burn out like most college couples that are only in it to "shack up" with each other. I had a girlfriend that I had to break up with a while ago (surprisingly we actually didn't have any sexual relations, the closest we got was to "second base" because we respected each others boundaries and wanted to see if we enjoyed each others company without the sex). We definitely clicked and liked each others company but it couldn't be because of some things that were happening in each of our separate lives (that being said it's not entirely set in stone and if we happen to decide that we can be good together and it's the right time to be together to deal with our individual hardships then we'll pick it back up). Keep in mind though I haven't told her about any of my fetishes or anything but I think that she had an idea of what I liked because of the way we were when we were alone together and I had a feeling that she was kind of turned on by those kinds of things (she knew that I had a thing for spanking though).

    This is just my experience and you could probably use it for a case study or anecdotal evidence but I highly doubt you'll get any quantitative results from a thread like this. But good luck with your boyfriend though, I hope you have a wonderful relationship.

  2. #22
    Diaper Lover


    Quote Originally Posted by Cloudy View Post
    It could mean that he didn't recieve enough love from his parents when he was a child. I would say that it is more of a subconcious desire for motherly care and affection than sexually wanting his own mom!
    You hit the nail on the head. That is exactly what being AB is about for me.

  3. #23


    I call my Mama 'Mama' because that's the best word for what she is.

    Look at it this way; what word describes someone who loves you totally, takes care of you, treats you like a little baby, dominates you (but lovingly!) and makes sure you're safe, warm and happy? 'Mommy' of course! That's the role you're fulfilling; the one of 'Mommy'...NOT 'Mother'. What I mean by that is you may be playing a maternal role for him, you're not pretending to be his IRL Mother.

    Another example is close female friends calling eachother 'sisters'; not the same, of course, but it's a similar concept. They're obviously not related IRL, but their bond is close enough to be family, and 'sister' is the best word to use in that situation.

  4. #24
    Diaper Lover
    AnalogRTO's Avatar


    Many people here have posed excellent views on why some of us are *B or whatever. The answers can be very individual for each person.

    What I often see when I look at most of us is that there is a desire to return to that 'safe' point in our lives. The time when you couldn't misbehave because you had no clue about 'right' or 'wrong'. Many people also feel that they 'missed out' on major aspects of their childhood. There are a lot of people who were pushed into being a responsible, mature person at a very young age, or who were abused or treated badly by parents.

    In my case, I have *ZERO* desire to do anything with my actual parents. I have no relationship with my mother--she humiliated and shamed me for my accidents and, as I found out later, never wanted a son in the first place. In total, it led to many things that I went through, and finally as an adult heard her tell me that she was "sorry she gave birth" to me.

    However, I enjoy being babied and snuggled by my wife extensively. With her I am secure and happy, I feel comfortable as I know she loves me for who I am. We also have children--that does not mean that our children are part of our play. It is kept private, and I love my children with all my heart. I would never want them to be a part of the play--that is just wrong.

    Overall, the biggest thing is that your boyfriend wants someone to care for him and love him for who he is, whether he still needs that childlike aspect cared for or not.

    As for breastfeeding or suckling, when my wife was lactating, I often would breastfeed from her. It was not an issue for either of us, she enjoyed it and it actually helped her from getting painfully overfull. There is nothing wrong with it in the least that I know of.

    In summary, sexuality is not black and white in any way. There is a wide spectrum of what people do and enjoy, and whatever consenting adults wish to do in the privacy of their home or bedroom is up to them. The rest of the world should have no voice about it.

  5. #25


    Quote Originally Posted by questioning View Post
    My boyfriend says things like mommy im hungry and mommy feel be and grabs my breasts. I thought this was a natural intrest in breastfeeding now he says things like mommy change my diaper and he went so far to say mommy im hungry then pulled down my shirt and started sucking. I have to say it turns me on or else I would have stoped it. ONE PROBLEM, does this mean he that he wants his mother sexually?
    Other people have pretty much said this already, but I really think the answer to this is a solid and easy "no."

    Quote Originally Posted by questioning View Post
    Does infantilism imply someone wants their real mommy or what is it? Im a psych major so im trying to analyze this, is it cause his abusive parents he feels he lacked love? Please help me out. It turns me on but the thought of him wanting his own mother RUINS IT.
    When you said he wants the love he lacked, you probably nailed it. A central theme of infantilism is the desire to be loved, cared for, and treated like a baby. It might involve sexual aspects too, especially when diapers get involved, but that's in the "Diaper Lover" realm, which is related, but I think your boyfriend, judging from the way you described him, is most likely to be an AB. Not that he can't be both, but it sounds like the predominant force is AB, rather than DL. Nobody really knows all the reasons infantilism can arise. It can be as simple as a trigger event during childhood where one sees another child in a diaper, or as difficult as an abuse situation in which a child did not receive a nurturing upbringing. I've seen a fair number of stories from both sides of that.

    Of course we're a little bit biased, but hear me out. I really honestly can't think of this as dangerous in any way. It's just a need he has, and it doesn't involve his real mother, nor does it involve real children (e.g., infantilism is NOT pedophilia). Infantilism, like any other fetish or paraphilia, or just sexual activity in general, has the chance to bring you two closer together. You can role-play/age-play in a completely non-sexual way and still have it be a bonding experience. All that's important is that you accept him.

    It sounds to me like you want to accept him but just want to get the myths debunked. Hopefully, we've been able to do that for you. Cheers, and I wish you all the best as you and your boyfriend discover each other.


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