"No drama" needs clarification

[ShippoFox]

When I first saw that, I thought it meant "do not talk about your problems on this forum" After thinking for a few seconds, I realize it doesn't quite mean that, but I'm not sure if everyone that ever comes across this forum will realize that. They might show up and see "Take your problems elsewhere. We don't want to hear about it, even if you are a DL!"

So, I think the wording of the rule should be changed or it should be expanded to be more specific about what is okay (asking for advice about real life stuff. some people might consider discussing problems to be drama... it's a crazy internet.) and isn't okay (saying how you hate some other board member for whatever reason, how some other board member is lying, etc.) Not exactly in my words, but something similar.

(wasn't sure if this deserved its own topic or not, but figured it was better than making the meme topic more confusing by talking about 50 different things in there)

[Lukie]

Originally Posted by ShippoFox

When I first saw that, I thought it meant "do not talk about your problems on this forum" After thinking for a few seconds, I realize it doesn't quite mean that, but I'm not sure if everyone that ever comes across this forum will realize that. They might show up and see "Take your problems elsewhere. We don't want to hear about it, even if you are a DL!"

I don't see how anyone discussing a problem on a support forum could perceive "no drama" to mean "don't talk about your problems". But I guess if you've seen it to be a problem, then maybe we should redefine what "no drama" actually means.

For clarity purposes, to me, drama is the act of disrupting or otherwise ruining the sensible nature of the community. Anything that is done in such a way that it is either controversial (amongst other users), offensive, flaming or making the forum just a little less nice place to be.

So, I think the wording of the rule should be changed or it should be expanded to be more specific about what is okay (asking for advice about real life stuff. some people might consider discussing problems to be drama... it's a crazy internet.) and isn't okay (saying how you hate some other board member for whatever reason, how some other board member is lying, etc.) Not exactly in my words, but something similar.

I mean, that's what this community is about. Helping others; "Support Community" is even a part of our group name. If anything, all factors point out that it's okay to post advice/help topics. I trust the judgement of this community enough that they respond appropriately to a certain topic.

So yeah... the definition is fine as I can see it.

[Moo]

"Drama" posts aren't just dramatic they are over dramatic.

The difference is that the subject matter being discussed does not deserve such dramatic presentation, and the presentation is neither funny nor useful.

Examples of non-drama:
"We have a new President!" is dramatic, but it is not over dramatic. Excitement is justified.
"Woe is me!" is dramatic, but if it comes after "hey, someone gave me a free plane flight to anywhere in the world!"... then it is fairly obviously has a humor value, and is not "drama".
"Guys, I feel that the new policy of requiring all newly registered users to enter their real name on the signup form will KILL the site" - isn't drama, because it is genuinely useful as a way to move the site forward. If I ever even considered such a crazy idea, I do hope the community would slap me for it.

Examples of drama :
* Using a lot of "!"s. One is enough.
* Suggesting that trivial things are really important, when they obviously aren't.
* Posting things which you KNOW will start a fight between one or more users.

Here are some things which ARE drama :
* "OMG I got negative reputation!!! WTF So unfair!!! I hate you all!"
* "OMG I split up with my boyfriend and now I have to cut myself and I hate everyone and my parents wear horrible pink and black outfits!!! And anyone who fails to feel sorry for me is an ass!".

The purpose of the "no drama" rule is not to prevent people getting support. Nor is it to prevent people talking about their problems. We are a support forum, after all!
The purpose of the no drama rule is to prevent people whining ENDLESSLY about completely trivial matters that nobody else cares about, and which have a tendancy to start fights and generally be a bad thing.

[DarkSunDS]

Here is a more accurate example of over drama-ism.
"omgggg wats wrong wit drama?66?6 u dotn undersrtand!!!111"
Drama and decent grammar don't blend very well. XP

I thought drama meant complaining about something in an exaggerated way, not an excitement like your first few examples, am I mistaken?

[Dash]

Originally Posted by Lukie

I mean, that's what this community is about. Helping others; "Support Community" is even a part of our group name. If anything, all factors point out that it's okay to post advice/help topics. I trust the judgement of this community enough that they respond appropriately to a certain topic.

So yeah... the definition is fine as I can see it.

I totally agree. But we offer our support as the ADISC community, not as the "come have a moan, we'll solve your problems" community. Now this isn't me saying it's wrong to - cos it's not. If I were to share my concerns or issue I have on the forums, it wouldn't be to moan or just for the hell of controversy; the way I see it, just having some support from forum friends, even when there's nothing they could physically do to help, can make a difference. Could be to reassure yourself that there are people in your life that give a damn at times when you need that little bit of reassurance... I don't know.

Drama is basically how Moo has put it in his (somewhat exaggerated) examples =P It's one thing to share your problems in hope that the words of others will help, but another to refuse to talk about anything other than how shit you feel, and continually express how much you want to die.

On the other hand, let's reiterate the fact that a large percentage of users on ADISC are teenagers. And I know myself, things can sometimes suck so much; they get you down so low, you're practically horizontal! Now you'll either keep it to yourself cos you feel it would be an outburst of your private life, or you'll share it cos you feel the best way to deal with it is to let it out. And sometimes it results in ranting and raving, even if it's not intentional.
I think we need to allow for that, in the sense that if someone starts moaning or "causing drama", not to neg rep them, or report them, but instead try to settle the situation to a point where the drama stops.

It could be saying "I understand where you're coming from and I feel for you, but life has it's problems and talking about it in an explicit manner will only make it worse for yourself, and others on the forums"...?

If it doesn't stop at that... then... by all means report away, i'd say.

And I fully realise this isn't the only form of e-drama, but it's definitely the most common form of it on tinternet.

So yeah. I think that's how to draw the line between "drama" and "raising a personal issue"...

[Abby_Cullen]

Actually, I never thought using two exclamation marks would be considered drama, I know I do that. For example,

Welcome to the board, I hope to see you around!!

I know it's not necessary, just a habit, hehe. Although, I can see how using the two could be a dumb thing to do when complaining about something futile.

[Kraiden]

2 or 3 exclamation marks are fine.

BUT USEING SO MANY LIKE THIS REALLY SUX!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!

[Lukie]

Aww, and I'm so fond of using a double exclamation mark after a space !!


What Moo and Dash said seems to be a fair accurate way to describe what I personally do and don't want to see on this forum.

[Tigger]

I think it means dramas like Home and Away or Neighbours...

[whitefox]

I would think as long as you present any problems without overstating them (or mentioning the same idea several times; "blowing it up") is okay. Simply complaining, and thusly not being constructive, I would label as drama.

So combining those two, I would get: Complaining (negatively) about a situation, while simultainously being non-constructive, is bad. Putting all of the emphasis on yourself is usually bad. In other words, if you've got an issue, mention it one time, ask for some help from the community in a kind manner (and hopefuly with at least semi-formal grammar), and continue on conversation from there. If nothing else, common curtesy would usually help out in a situation like this. Just my